Not So Perfect
by HippyWhippy
Summary: It had been three weeks, and Judai was still staying with Johan. Not that he minded, of course...


This fic contains copious amounts of boy-on-boy sex and feelings.  
You've been warned.

Judai shivered against him, and Johan gave him a side-long look, tucking a strand of teal hair behind his ear. It had been three weeks, and Judai was _still _staying with him. Not that he minded, or course; Judai was his best friend, and he hated it when he went on his long trips. He missed the days of duel academia, when it was a simple ten-minute-walk to the Slifer red dorm, and they would take food onto the roof and sit and eat and fall asleep it the sun next to each other. Johan shivered at the thought of them casually touching like they did, and Judai noticed and grinned. "You know, I understand why _I'm _so cold, but you've lived here all your life; surely winters like this don't bother _you_?"  
He cracked a smile. "You'd be surprised." Little did he know, it was the thought of their hands brushing, or shoulders touching, that made him involuntarily tremble. No, he didn't mind Judai staying with him at all; but he wanted to know. If Judai was going to stay for much longer, Johan wanted to go out and buy him a good, proper coat, not the thin one that he wore. –And he was going to move him off the couch and into the guest bedroom. Not being able to hear Johan's worrisome thoughts, Judai calmly sipped his coco, slipping further under the blanket they shared and closer to Johan. He couldn't just _ask,_ could he? What if Judai thought that meant he wanted him to leave?  
"You have coco on your nose, Judai."  
He grinned. "Oops." His tongue was nowhere near long enough to reach, so he wiped it away instead, settling himself against Johan, whose attention shifted from the TV to the sound of the rain pelting heavily against the window, turning the once-flawlessly white snow to a muddy, watery sludge, making the ground outside impossible to navigate, which, really, was one of the true treacheries of winter there. A week ago, it had been a calm, warm day of weather, warm enough to sit outside with Judai and watch the sunrise.  
The TV highlighted Judai's features, making them sharper and casting shadows across his face. Johan looked away when he realized he was staring, somehow his gaze always returned to Judai. He took Judai's mug from his hands, muttering something about a refill, and Judai gratefully accepted his offer. He spent as much time as he could in the kitchen, preparing the coco, warming the milk up on the stove and pilling the drink with excessive amounts of chocolate, plus one guilty spoonful in his mouth. Eventually, though, he had to return the presence of his secret crush, who, truthfully, was soon to eat him out of house and home.  
With a small smile, Judai accepted his drink and waited for Johan to join him once again on the couch, nuzzling close to him when he did. He found it impossible to focus on the movie, despite the fact that Judai had insisted that it was 'awesome'. For someone who acted so simple, Judai sure was complicated.  
Or maybe Johan was just over thinking things.

"Johan! Johan, please wake up!"  
Straight away, Johan felt that his face, and any part of his body that wasn't covered by the thick blanket, was numb. The window being battered by the rain and wind sounded so strained that he feared it would break, and it was freezing cold. Judai sat at the edge of the bed, the blankets he slept with on the couch pooling around his waist. He'd bought them with him, yet his face was pale aside from his cheeks and the tip of his nose, which were flushed pink. "_Dæffen steike!" _he sat up quickly, reaching for Judai's face. "You look frozen!"  
Judai moved into the touch, allowing him to cup his cheek. "I know, I know. I didn't know what to do…."  
Johan shifted over to the left, flicking the blanket back. "Get in with me!" He insisted, and relief flooded Judai's face. Clearly, that's what he'd been hoping for, but he didn't know how to ask. He laid his own bedding over Johan's before slipping into the bed beside him. Their skin touched, and Johan resisted the urge to draw back. "Judai, how long have you been sitting out there, freezing?" he hissed.  
"The fire went out around 12:40." He admitted curling up into a tight ball under the sheets. "I… I wasn't sure what to do…."  
He reached for his curled body, and, wrapping his arms around him tightly, Johan scolded, "You should have come straight in here! I would have gotten up and rekindled the fire for you. You're as cold as death…." Pharaoh, realizing that he was the only one in the lounge, quickly curled up at the foot of the bed, sitting at Judai's feet. Said boy uncurled himself and moved closer to Johan, closer than he'd thought was possible, and once again nuzzled against his warmth. "Thanks, Johan. You're the best; I couldn't have asked you to do that though…"  
Johan blushed at being so highly praised, thankful for the darkness. "It's better than you getting hypothermia and dying on me, isn't it?"  
Judai's only response was the sound of chattering teeth. After about ten minutes, he stopped shivering and his fingers curled around Johan's shoulder softly, leaving him once again to wonder about Judai. He had recently come to terms with his feelings for the other boy- he realized that most friends didn't crave the type of contact that he did- that type of contact that he was receiving right at that second. It reminded him a little of Shou and Kenzan; they'd both pretty much been in love with Judai, fighting over even the simplest of his affections. Even after his reign as the Supreme King, they'd held him in quite high regard. Asuka, Jim, even Manjoume- they all harboured their little crushes on Judai, and yet, he remained deaf to the world. It gave Johan a little satisfaction knowing that none of _them _had probably been as close to Judai- physically- than he was. Although it did sadden him that, just as Judai had remained ignorant to their advances, he would also remain ignorant to his own.  
His awareness of him was slowly becoming overwhelming; Judai was pressed so closely to him that he could feel the rise and fall of his chest against his own. He didn't seem to mind Johan's hold on his waist, nor did he seem to care about their closeness. A familiar feeling was building between his legs, and he knew that if he should have become erect, Judai would have felt it. He tried to think of something else, anything, to keep _that _thought from forming- The thought of stripping away Judai's clothing and worshipping his body with his mouth, trailing kisses down, teasingly, only to crawl back up and kiss his soft, sweet lips instead.  
"Johan, are you ok?"  
"Go to sleep." He ordered.  
Judai tried to sit up. "Are you ok?" He repeated. "Am I making you uncomfortable?"  
He lowered his voice. "No, it's fine. I just….. bathroom." He lied, slipping out from under the warm blankets and out into the harsh, uninviting, cold. Once there, he tried and tried to think of something that wasn't arousing- _anything_. An Image of Professor Cronos flashed into his mind, and he shuddered. Feeling completely free of any aroused feelings, he did his business and then quickly headed back to the bed, where Judai was most like waiting for him-  
Oh shit.  
_Think of the Professor_.  
Judai's hands were all over him when he dove back under the covers. "Johan, you're freezing! Don't leave again, please."  
"I know, I'm sorry. But I had to…. Y'know."  
With a soft, little content sigh, Judai pulled him close again. "Yeah." They lapsed into silence for all of twenty seconds before Judai spoke again. "Hey, Johan?"  
"Hm?"  
He was quiet for a while longer, the only sound the sound of their breathing. "….You…. _like _me, don't you?"  
In one rapid moment, Johan felt his heart beat seven times faster than it had before, before icing over and shattering. "I… um…. I…. uh….."  
Judai didn't wait for him to answer. "Is that okay, though? Isn't that like, a sin, or something?" He squinted at Johan through the darkness, with a concerned look on his face.  
Finally, Johan found his tongue. "Of course it's okay!" He blurted. "I mean, I don't see how it would hurt anyone. I…. is that okay with you though?"  
"It's not hurting anyone…" Judai said softly to himself. "I guess you're right! I just wasn't sure, I'd never liked anyone before now, so-"  
Johan gripped his shoulder. "What do you mean?"  
Judai smiled. "I've always liked you, Johan. You're really nice and good looking and interesting and everything. –And since you like me, and we're not hurting anyone, that's good, isn't it? That's great!" He enthused cheerily. It started to sink in when Judai pulled him closer and kissed the cold, tip of his nose. Suddenly catching on, Johan felt like slapping him.  
"You're so complicated!" He yelled. "You don't make sense! I just don't understand you, Judai Yuki!"  
With a small laugh, Judai grabbed his hand. "So we can be together, right? I can kiss you and touch you now, right?"  
"…..Touch me?"  
Judai's hand made his way underneath his shirt, resting against the smooth, flat of his stomach. "This is okay, right? I've wanted you for so long…."  
"Wanted me…." Johan repeated in a whisper. "I want you too, Judai…."  
For a while, neither moved. They stayed where they were, with Judai's hand tracing light circles on his stomach. After a while, Judai spoke up again. "Can we kiss?"  
"Of course we can." Neither of them moved.  
He tried again. "Can you kiss me, please?"  
Johan didn't know why it had to be that way, but if that's what Judai wanted- He leaned forward and lightly pressed their lips together, something he'd wanted to do for such a long time. Judai whimpered and parted his lips slightly, and Johan was suddenly praying to every god he knew that that wasn't a dream. He would never be happy again if it was a dream. The brunette gripped his bicep gently, trying to pull himself closer, but it wasn't possible. They were as close as they could have been. After a while, they pulled away, but Johan kept kissing him still, short little desperate pecks. To hell if it was a dream, he was going to enjoy it. Judai panted, and Johan took the boy's bottom lip between his and licked along it feeling the ridges. He felt the same being done on his top lip as Judai became bolder. The bluenette had never experienced anything like it before; lips locked into position, tongues flicking over each other. He managed to catch the other's between his lips and sucked on it. He heard Judai moan and part his lips a little more, allowing him to slick their tongues over one another. After a while, Judai pulled away and gasped to him, "You can touch me, if you want. I want you to. I… please, Johan. I want…" That was definitely a blush that spread across Judai's cheeks, as he struggled to find his words. Same as before, he didn't seem to want to come right out and say it. –He was still a little shy and unsure, so Johan had to guess what he wanted and make it happen for him. He pulled him closer and started to gently kiss his neck.  
The need to be closer to him was overwhelming, but there were still clothes separating them. Daringly, he pushed the shirt up a little, feeling his taunt chest and stomach. His skin was curved and perfectly smooth; Johan's boldness surprised himself, but he was still half-convinced that it was a dream. He'd never imagined that it could actually be _happening_.

It was only a small step to move from running his hands up and down Judai's chest, to pulling off his shirt. Judai gasped as Johan disappeared under the blankets, and he pulled them up a little bit to keep himself from getting cold. He loved the feel of Johan's lips, sliding slowly down his stomach before pulling his tracksuit pants down and off.  
Johan was a little awed at the sight of Judai, completely naked. Before proceeding, he pinched himself. _This is happening, this is real_. He swallowed thickly, running his hands over Judai's thighs. He sighed in a sinfully sexy way- _This is happening. Judai _wants _you_.  
Part of him was screaming at himself to take his time; make a show of _slowly _pulling off Judai's clothes, savour every moment of it. But at the same time, he was still half convinced he was dreaming. It was all happening too fast, he didn't have to time to think. Judai himself was a little embarrassed to be showing his body to someone, but he trusted Johan, so he tried to ignore the feeling of shame. Johan did not seem to see the same faults in Judai that he did in himself; He kissed slowly down his body, just below his bellybutton, then lower…  
His tongue moved out from between his lips to gently lick the tip of Judai's arousal, and his hips moved up into the touch. Johan's braced his hands on Judai's hips, holding him down as he licked up and then back down the shaft, while the brunette panted and whimpered. Suddenly, the warmth surrounding him was incredible, and he gasped Johan's name. His lips moulded around him perfectly as he slid his head down, eyes shut so their intense blue wasn't visible. Judai arched his back, hips thrusting up and ankles digging into the mattress Johan's swirling tongue became more focused on one particular spot on the underside of Judai's shaft. "I'm nearly there…." Judai moaned, and then suddenly Johan opened his eyes and looked up at him. It wasn't as though he'd never looked into Johan's eyes before, but now? Where they always so deep and filled with need? Without warning, Johan pulled away. The brunette whined, hands trying to grip his shirt, but the fabric slipped through his fingers. With a smile, Johan shushed him, reaching over him and slipping his hand under the bed.  
The blanket slipped down to Johan's waist as he sat between Judai's spread legs and coated his fingers with lubricant, but how could the cold affect Judai now? His skin felt heated, and burned with every touch. The teal-haired boy braced himself over his new lover. He pressed their lips together before kissing his way towards Judai's ear. "Is this okay…?"  
"Please…." Judai moaned. He was so _close_.  
"I've waited for this for a long time." Johan admitted. "I wasn't sure that it would ever happen, but I hoped. J-Judai, there's one thing I've always wanted to hear you say to me."  
Scraping this teeth across his bottom lip, Judai looked up at him. "What is it?" He whispered, his voice hoarse.  
Johan hesitated. "Say that you want me." He said slowly. "I've waited so long to hear you say those words."  
"I meant to say that long ago." Judai confessed, and then cried out as Johan pushed a finger against his opening, but did not enter him. "Yes...yes, yes, I want you in me now, so bad, Johan... I love you...please..."  
His fingers finally breached Judai's walls, which tightened ecstatically as he felt along the velvet inside of his lover. "Oh, Judai…" He sighed, before he began to stretch and delve deep into Judai's body. After a while, he grinned wickedly, twisted his fingers and shoved against that alarmingly sensitive spot within that made his brunette best friend positively writhe with pure ecstasy, thrusting his hips forward against Johan's long, slender fingers.  
Johan himself discovered that he was painfully hard, but despite his own desperate need for pleasure, he continued to delve into the spot deep within his lover, drawing out his moans and using them as fuel for his own arousal. Judai tightened around him, so, so close to orgasm, and Johan pulled out again.  
Judai could barely believe how disappointed he felt. Twice now, Johan had denied him pleasure. He quickly forgot all about that as Johan stripped himself of his shirt and pants, sitting stark naked in front of him; Now they were both naked, however Johan didn't seem embarrassed as Judai had been. He kissed Judai again, as softly as his lust crazed state would allow him to. He gripped Judai's skinny hips in his hands and aligned himself. "Are you ready?"  
"Yes."  
That was all that was needed before he thrust hard into the heat that welcomed him gladly, and Judai wasn't sure what Johan was saying in Norsk, but he was pretty sure they were swears. He pulled out and plunged back in again even deeper, savouring every sweet noise that met his ears that came from the brunette's lips. Johan set the pace, figuring that Judai would have preferred a speed that allowed, for a moment, to just bask in the intensity of the feelings that were spiralling out of control, as they both did with duelling.  
Judai was whimpering in what Johan could have mistaken for pain, if he didn't know any better. He wrapped his arms around Johan's neck and muttered sweet nothing's against his skin about how good it felt, how big he was, and about how he'd never felt anything like it before.  
Johan wanted to discover every inch of Judai's exposed skin; taste his flesh and sweat and sex. He wanted Judai to call his name as he orgasmed. His thrusts penetrated him and he never failed to encourage Judai to constrict around him by telling him that he loved him. Judai was making all matters of high pitched keening noises, and he was so, so close to finishing.  
"Holy shit, Johan-!" Judai swore as once again, Johan's member came into contact with his prostate, and recklessly, he drove himself downwards against him to try and make him go faster, which, as he guessed, worked as Johan quickly lost control of his restraint. He grasped Judai's worked length, noting, even then, how hard and wet it was, and the way handling it roughly caused Judai's cries of pleasure to skyrocket in terms of pitch and volume, which neither of them had known was possible.  
But once again, it was looking into each other's eyes that did it. Judai slowly opened his eyes and Johan felt an electric shock of pleasure run through him. Judai's eyes were a deep chocolate brown, but they were slightly unfocused and hazed with lust. Lust, he realized, that was reserved just for him. He was wearing an expression of adoration that pierced into Johan's very heart. Johan choked on a moan and he buried himself deep in Judai as said boy called out his name feverously. "J-Johan-!"  
-And then, he was gone.  
Each of them trembled violently as waves of pleasure rocked through them, spiking and shooting straight through them, flooding them, completely destroying them and killing them, and then yet, they were still alive to feel it as they pressed against each other, hot, sweaty, and tired. When he heard Judai's breathing return to normal, he patted Judai's thigh as a signal and took hold of his hips, carefully pulling himself free of his lover's tight embrace, before they collapsed on the bed next to each other, pulling the several layers of thick doona up before the cold could reach their feverously heated bodies.  
Johan giggled, high on pleasure and adrenaline. "That was great!" He enthused. "Oh, wow, that was…. Better than I ever could have imagined!"  
Judai grinned. "I'm glad you think so."  
Pharaoh had, at some point, either been kicked off the bed, or he'd left the room, before he jumped back up and settled again, glaring at them for disrupting his sleep. Johan was very happy, but something was weighing heavily on Judai's mind. "…What is it, Judai?"  
"Johan…" Judai sighed. "….you realize that… Yubel is a part of me, now. I know that maybe now that you've had your way with me I won't matter to you anymore. I honestly don't want you to get any further involved in my problems, but I also want you to know that I love you, and I love being your friend."  
To his surprise, Johan blinked at him. "You think…. I'm going to abandon you?" Judai jumped as Johan wrapped his arms tightly around him. "Judai, in this world, there are perfect people and then there are less-than-perfect-people. There's no such thing as imperfection, though. I could never leave you, because even with all your faults and problems you're still perfect to me, and you always have been."  
He froze. "But…."  
"You really thought that I would hate you? You're clueless, as usual, Judai! –But I guess it must be my fault. I'll make sure to tell you every day how much I love you so that you don't ever forget it!"  
Finally, he hugged Johan back . "What about… Yubel?"  
A dark feeling could be felt settling in the room at the mention of Yubel's name. Johan just smiled, holding him at arm's length. "Yubel is perfect too! I decided a long time ago that I would love both you and Yubel. You and her are one now."  
Judai punched him. Not hard, but enough to hurt. "You seducer!" He yelled, and Johan laughed. After a moment, Judai laughed too. "Are you sure?"  
"Of course I am, Judai. I don't just love you, I _want _you. I _need _you. Nothing will _ever _change that."  
Judai gripped his hand and squeezed it tightly. "I was…. afraid."  
Johan kissed him. "You have us, now. You don't ever need to be afraid again. Please stay with me and be happy forever!"  
There was a short pause. "Johan…" Judai said sleepily. "That sounds… absolutely perfect."


End file.
